Exercise. Ugh. Such a love hate relationship we have developed over my life thus far.
When depressed, it is the last thing I want to do. And the thing I most need. It can be so hard to break the cycle of feeling blah by doing something that is not always fun and exhausting in the short-term, even if it produces energizing results in the long term.
I have a threenager and a seven year old, both boys. They fight – A LOT. They’re also sweet and loving at times, they share toys most days, and they protect each other. Did I mention they fight a lot, though?
Today while driving home from the store, we passed down our familiar country roads. That’s when I saw it. One baby cow, outside of her broken fence, grazing along the side of the road.
Hello Party People! We are back after a brief hiatus… Well, I honestly went down in flames for a few weeks there. I had a nasty sinus infection that turned into antibiotics, which happened to spur a really bad week long tummy reaction probably coupled with a viral issue, which ultimately sent me to the ER last night for severe pain and a newly diagnosed hernia. GOOD TIMES! Don’t be jealous; I didn’t even lose any weight! Pshh.
I am the polar opposite of a hoarder. Clutter gives me anxiety and I rarely have a hard time letting go of things – especially if I have not used them recently. Oh, sure – I will keep items that may come in handy or have a possible use in the near future. However, I just feel better when things have homes they belong in, and my house is not overgrown in trinkets or random useless items. If I love it, I keep it. If not, it gets donated, recycled, or chucked.
Do I enjoy having my shit together? Absolutely. Is it a facade more than half the time? Definitely.
Have you ever seen a gray moon?
Not just the color,
Sort of overcast, hanging sadly in the shadows of the night,
It illuminates nothing, and yet it still gives off a pitiful puff of light
Like the end of the last drag of a wilting cigarette.
Lifeless, dull, dreary, weathered
Smudged glass reflecting fingerprints
Yellowing newspapers crinkled in a scrapbook
Quietly standing by, observing the night
From the corner of a barren room,
Perhaps a musty-scented basement?
Perspective can change its appearance and
The moon can illuminate -White! Harvest! Yellow! Shining!
But not tonight
Not here
Not in this season
It is just gray.
I can relate.
I never thought I would be the kind of person to celebrate the mass destruction of other living things. However, this fall I am eagerly anticipating the desolation of the unreal amount of mosquitos living in our midst. No doubt, this coming seasonal extermination will probably be my favorite thing about this October, other than the beautiful leaves and crisp autumn air. Beauty and destruction; a rigid dichotomy.
Crisp autumn air is not quite here yet, but I can feel it coming, just like Phil Collins.
Someone needs to get these apple cider donuts out of my house, stat! Who the heck thought I would have the willpower to resist their sugary goodness when I purchased this 12 pack from the pumpkin farm?! I see now that I was lying to myself, full at the time off an ice cold beer and fresh, buttery corn on the cob. As I polished off my 4th donut today, I thought ‘Wow, I cannot be contained. Hello, Fall leggings and baggy sweatshirts!”
